


𝐝𝐚𝐝𝐝𝐲 𝐢𝐬𝐬𝐮𝐞𝐬

by orphan_account



Category: ATEEZ (Band)
Genre: Abusive Parents, Abusive Relationships, Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Alternate Universe - Bikers, Angry Sex, Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Biker Gang, Biker San, Bikers, Choi San is Whipped, Denial of Feelings, Drunk Sex, Everyone Is Gay, Except Jongho, Fight Sex, Friends With Benefits, HONGJOONG IS A LITTLE SHIT., Hiatus, Incest, Love Triangle, Love Triangles, M/M, Minor Character Death, Minor Original Character(s), Minor Seoyeon, Oblivious, On Hiatus, Original Character(s), Parent/Child Incest, Poor Seonghwa, Rape, Rape/Non-con Elements, SEONGHWA IS BABIE, San and Jongho are brothers, Seoguk, Seonghwa is lonely, Seonghwa is so bratty, Smut, Threats of Rape/Non-Con, Underage Rape/Non-con, but san doesnt rape seonghw-, i count drunk sex as rape depending on how drunk you are, made up characters - Freeform, seoyeon, 산, 성화
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-28
Updated: 2020-07-07
Packaged: 2021-03-03 21:49:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 5,883
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24972622
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Seonghwa was stuck in a loop ofromance, depression, alcohol and sex.All until the biker, Choi San stirred inthe mix.
Relationships: Choi San & Park Seonghwa, Choi San/Park Seonghwa, Kim Hongjoong/Park Seonghwa
Comments: 9
Kudos: 27





	1. Chapter 1

𝐟𝐰𝐛 𝐚𝐮.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


𝐈 𝐭𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐰𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐧𝐚𝐦𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐫𝐚𝐢𝐧,   
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐫𝐚𝐢𝐧 𝐧𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐜𝐚𝐦𝐞,   
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


𝐬𝐨 𝐈 𝐦𝐚𝐝𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐮𝐧

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


나에게 상처를 주다 - from the one that loves you, to Kim Hongjoong.


	2. Chapter 2

𝐞𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐡𝐮𝐫𝐭 - 𝐬𝐞𝐨𝐧𝐠𝐡𝐰𝐚

𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐲 𝐩𝐢𝐥𝐥 - 𝐬𝐚𝐧


	3. Chapter 3

× 𝐁𝐨𝐲𝐱𝐁𝐨𝐲  
× 𝐒𝐦𝐮𝐭  
× 𝐀𝐛𝐮𝐬𝐞  
× 𝐀𝐧𝐠𝐬𝐭

𝐼𝑓 𝑦𝑜𝑢𝑟 𝑜𝑓𝑓𝑒𝑛𝑑𝑒𝑑 𝑏𝑦 𝑎𝑛𝑦 𝑜𝑓 𝑡𝒉𝑒𝑠𝑒,, 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑐𝑎𝑛 𝑐𝑙𝑖𝑐𝑘 𝑜𝑓𝑓. 𝐼𝑓 𝑦𝑜𝑢𝑟 𝑖𝑛𝑡𝑒𝑟𝑒𝑠𝑡𝑒𝑑...𝑝𝑙𝑒𝑎𝑠𝑒 𝑐𝑜𝑛𝑡𝑖𝑛𝑢𝑒.


	4. Chapter 4

Even after a year, Seonghwa still wasn't over his ex. He wasn't over all of those precious, precious moments with Hongjoong, he wasn't over the way he still lurked and lingered in his mind, haunting him. It hurt Seonghwa on that day of an unlucky October the 23th. That day, he thought it was normal for Hongjoong to not be home, assuming he had to go to work or something like that. But he never returned, and he took all of his things with him. Blatantly abandoning Seonghwa without a word. Seonghwa had spent everyday in and out of the getting drunk and fucking random strangers trying to get over his red headed ex, but he had never thought tonight would change everything the next morning.

Seonghwa smirked as he tossed back his final shot of Soju, completely wasted. He felt like the word around him became slower, and the only person with him was that handsome black and red haired stranger across the bar that gave him the same look. Seonghwa licked his lips stumbling over to the stranger. Without any hesitation, seonghwa pulled the other into a lip lock, mixing saliva with the other, melting into eachother like honey, forgetting they were even in a club surrounded by hundreds of people and earsplitting music.

They pulled away from the kiss with a string of mixed saliva lingered between the two, their mouths not even having to speak but their eyes doing the job for them. The red - black headed stranger giving Seonghwa a knowing smirk that meant "follow me."

•••°°°•••

Seonghwa slammed the door shut, pressing San's body against the door not wasting anytime to reunite their lips in the sweet taste of eachother.

  
The longer the kiss got, the more sloppier it became with Seonghwa's plump lips exchanging saliva with the San's swollen ones lips smacking, wet sounds filling the room as their tongues fought in a battle of dominance, seonghwa taking over, leading the kiss in an even more devious, lustful place. Pulling away, the two stared at eachother with a haze of lust in their eyes, both hungry and wanting more of eachother. A smirk tugged at the corner of San's lips as he switched places with Seonghwa, slamming him against the door instead, moving in close to his ear. "You stopped, so you bottom." 

"That's not ah-" Seonghwa's words being pushed into a slur with San's lips working magic on his neck, kissing and biting in just the right places for Seonghwa to bite his lip holding back the sweet moans that San ached to hear. 

San removed Seonghwa's sweatpants along with his Calvin Klein all in one go dropping to his knees with a thud. The newly exposed cold air sending shivers down Seonghwa's spine, and before he knew it, San's strawberry lips were on his member, sucking so hard and fast that Seonghwa could release in that very moment, licking the underside with his tongue, the cold touch of his tongue piercing making the older go crazy, his hands being naughty couldn't help but wrap themselves in San's damp hair, trusting into his throat, making San hum on his member, the vibrations, causing him to release instantly. San glared up at the older, swallowing his release before standing hoisting the other up against the door as if he weight nothing, continuing that sweet lip lock they had while walking the older to the silky bed.

Losing himself in the intoxicating taste of San's velvety, faint cherry lip balm, Seonghwa hoisted his hips up, the motions in which his hips swayed providing the both of them with the friction they each yearned for and silently pleaded for. 

San's hands tracing all sorts of invisible shapes and patterns, feeling Seonghwa's slides up just in the right way for him to let out a small whimper. The noise went straight to San's cock, breaking the kiss and moving down to bite down on seonghwas neck, leaving dark purple hickeys with beautiful blue hues before reaching that spot, his sweet spot that made seonghwa whine, pushing his hips against san's thigh, grinding forward until their groins ground against each other in just the right way, whiny moans leaving seonghwas mouth that had san aching, begging and pleading to hear that noise sweet moan again.  
"If you want it so bad, beg for it." San whispered to the older who whined out, spilling pleads and begs of 'I need you's'. The more the older became a needy mess, the more San enjoyed the effect he had on the latter.

"San please. I can't- It hurts. If your going to fuck me please–just so it already please I'm begging you." The older whined out once more finally getting San to further move on. He removed his shirt, finally exposing his toned abs that Seonghwa couldn't resist to just jot his hands all over San's torso, touching him in ways that only made him more impatient than he already was. San slid S shirt over his head with ease, discarding the useless piece of clothing onto the floor, peppering sweet kisses all across Seonghwa's chest, being sure to bite his nipple which made him scream in pleasure, leaving a few small hickeys on his chest. He peppered those sweet kisses all the way down to Seonghwa's v-line, looking up at him with nothing but pure lust in his eyes, but also consent.  
All it took was a slight nod from Seonghwa.

San stood, removing his jeans that nicely shaped his rock hard c*ck. He reached for a condom that'd been on the counter next to the bed before they had even arrived in the room, slipping it on his hard on, but when he reached for the lube, Seonghwa stopped him.

"No lube.."

"Are you sure?"

Seonghwa narrowed his eyebrows pulling San in my his chin for a slow, lustful needy kiss, pulling away with a string of their mixed saliva connecting their swollen lips, not being able to have enough of eachother, with every kiss they had it felt like their bodies were burning with lust, want, _desire,_ for one to break the other, they needed eachother. And with every touch, they just became more and more fond of eachothers touch.

**_"Fuck me until I beg you to stop, make me cry...break me."_ **

San smirked to himself as he nodded. His mind went into a world of his sadistic fantasies as he threw one of Seonghwa's legs over his shoulder, thanking that he had been this flexible. Looking at the man who had been on full display for him, he was beautiful. Seonghwa looked ethereal under him, with his hair swaying in many different directions, lips swollen, glistening with San's saliva, eyes filled with pure lust. 

And finally, without a warning, he thrusted into Seonghwa, making Seonghwa bite his lip arching his back off the sheets which San smirked at, not even giving Seonghwa a second to adjust before he began thrusting in and out of Seonghwa's walls that clenched around him, feeling the heat of his body.

The younger could tell Seonghwa was holding back moans just by the sight of his face which made him chuckle sadistically, wrapping his slender fingers around Seonghwa's neck, tears building in his eyes which made San feel even more prideful, completely demolishing the other that was just so confident only a few minutes earlier. The more San thrusted deeply into him the more he felt that pit just building up in his stomach, San's trusts also getting sloppier after a few minutes knowing what was about to come to them both. The moonlight shone through the window, the bright light illuminating off of their bodies with finally one more thrust that made Seonghwa finally let out a loud moan and a slur of curse words between english and korean when San his his prostate dead on, releasing all over his abdomen. 

This is what made Seonghwa forget about his ex. Forget about everything, the way he looked, the way he smelled, everything about him. Seonghwa's mind was completely tainted with none other than _Choi San._

"You think we're done?" San chuckled with a sadistic tone to his voice, with all ill intentions, he flipped Seonghwa over and before the latter could even get a word out, sans fingers were wrapped in his hair, another on his hip squeezing hard enough to leave a bruise as he thrusted in and out at an animalistic pace, the bed protesting under the two, headboard ramming into the wall.

And this time, Seonghwa couldn't help but scream as hot tears rolled down his eyes, San pulling his sweaty, glistening back on his chest, giving him even more room to thrust at a better angle. Only within a matter of seconds seonghwa came again on the sheets this time, screaming and crying at the overstimulation, he would've collapsed if San didn't still have his hands wrapped around his chest, San grunting at how Seonghwa's walls instantly clenched around his length.

"So, you done? Or do you wanna ride me?"

"You're...fucking...crazy." he said in between breathy pants. Seonghwa, he looked beautiful this way, with a hazy smile on his lips, eyes tired dry tears on his cheeks with drool on his chin he looking completely fucked out, and even right now in this state he looked completely ethereal to san.

He couldn't help but kiss him.

A kiss that meant just a bit  
Just a tiny bit more than an intoxicated kiss.

San leaned down to the older, softly kissing his swollen lips with nothing but passion Seonghwa blinked before smiling, drunkenly giggling when San wrapped his arm around Seonghwa's body, resting his head in San's chest.  
Something the older used to do with Hongjoong every night, every time they watched movies together, slept together, ate together...weirdly enough, Seonghwa felt secure in the others arms. And that sense of security was just enough for him to smile just a bit before finally falling asleep cuddled up in the others arms, in the cum stained sheets.

Maybe it was just the fact that he was drunk, maybe that's why he felt secure. Maybe that's why in that moment, he felt like everything would be okay.

Knowing it wouldn't be.

가능한.....ㅋ...ㅋ...ㅋ..

**1718 words.**   
**Did not proofread.**   
**1/?**

Just to clarify that...

if you don't like bottom Hwa...

**BUELLO BUELLO YOUR WAY OUT OF HER-**  
  
  
Hehehehe

**😗**

**— Hym**


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> GRAPHIC DECEPTIONS OF Incest Rape, Abuse, Drug Usage and Alcoholism.
> 
> [ I didn't proofread. ]

That addicting line of white powder made him feel a rush of adrenaline, breaking out into a cold sweat. It felt so good as he felt the drug travel throughout his body, electrifying his veins he sat back into the couch, closing his eyes as he felt his body relax, muscles softening as his body settled into a state of euphoric masked depression.

This was a refugee for him.

Wasted - Seoguk at this point couldnt think, and the alcohol in front of him didn't even taste the same as before, it felt as if he was losing all of his senses, ears ringing and his eyes blurry, not realizing anything as it was, hallucinating rainbow colors and all sorts of figures and objects that stood before him. He felt himself sinking into the leather cushions as his world looked as it it was covered in a filter of a dark vignette.

This was so addicting for him. He felt like he was floating, on top of the world.

He never usually got this intoxicated no, but this day, this day was different. July 5th. She'd be disgusted in him, her voice was haunting him, loud in his ears in fact - everything was. The dripping of the tap water that was more than seven feet away, loud in the kitchen sink, he could hear everything as of now, sinking into the pothole of misery which was his couch in which broken bottles of Hennessy and a sorts of toxins and chemicals he knew that were killing him from the inside out – but he couldn't stop himself from going back again, and again. He couldn't stop himself.

Tears now pooling in his eyes, blurring his vision as his breathing became shallow and heavy against his chest, sweat dripping down his forehead rolling down his neck, and he couldn't breath, feeling as though he was being choked by regrets and guilt weighing down on his shoulders, that same feelings he never dared to talk about to anyone. And now that bottle inside of him - that bottle that was built up inside of him was toppling, spilling over not being able to keep the cork on, overflowing, though physically, the alchohol, and the drugs melted his pain away, it was all there mentally.

He felt his knees buck that held the weight of his body, his legs feeling like jello now, now his body felt like it was floating, like he was sinking into the floor underneath of him in a quick sand. He could hear his fiance speaking to him from wherever her soul remained, asking him why he had to result like this, why he couldn't have been better for their son, why he ran away from his problems instead of facing them upfront, being that a question he couldn't answer to his thoughts that were intruded with Seoyeon's voice.

He missed that.

Being so high on his thoughts and drunk from the alcohol, he hadn't heared the door open, with his blurry vision, he thought it was his one true love. Yet it was just his son, that looked like an exact replica of his mother.

"Dad.." Seonghwa's eyes on his father surrounded - surrounded by alcohol bottles and all broken glass, the acidic liquid poured on the floor, skits and dollops on cocaine scattered on the table. His father was an absolute mess, looking miserable, yet angry.  
And Seonghwa knew he should've ran right then and there.  
But he didn't.

He was used to this.

He was used to getting smacked across his face yes, he was used to getting punched to the ground spitting out blood. He was used to being kicked...hit with leather belts. It was all normal for him, using concealer, foundation and blush to mask his bruises, his scars. He didn't even feel it if he was being honest, it was all just sort of...numb to him. He didn't feel that pain anymore. He didn't really feel anything anymore besides the excitement of sex that relived his nerves.

That's all he cared about.  
Because after those countless hours of getting beaten by Seoguk, crimson blood oozing from his cheek, coughing up his own blood, yet he was still able to forgive his father.

Why?

Because, he had no other choice.  
His father was the only thing he had, only thing he ever had. He never had friends, no, and if he did they all just left him. He never had anyone to turn to, he never had any chances to really smile, be happy..not even with Hongjoong. His father provided everything for him really. His father was the one that brought him a phone, the reason he wears these nice clothes, the reason theres always food on the table.  
So he had to.

He had to force himself to stand, he had to limp to his room and forget everything, clearing his mind and forgetting that easily like nothing even happened.  
But the pain was underlying.  
He just never showed it, to anyone.

He couldn't sleep, nearly being 8 pm, that lump in his throat wouldn't let him. Tears pricking in the corner of his eyes as thoughts overflowed him, his breathing becoming even more quick and shallow - sharp as his heart pounded against his chest. He couldn't stop his tears from falling no matter how many times he wiped his eyes, letting the stray tears run into the open wounds on his temple, the salty liquid stinging the pierced skin.

He remembered the times when his mother would be there next to him, crouched down while she stroked his bangs from his face after reading him a bedtime story about a two princes that fell in love before tucking him in, giving him a goodnights kiss.  
He wondered what life would be like if she was still here.

Seoguk knew what he was deep down, he was a sorry, sour excuse for a father. But he just couldn't handle the fact that _she_ left him, and that _she_ looked exactly, like her son.  
  


* * *

  
  
The clock stroke 12 and Seoguk decided he needed to apologize to his son whom he swore loved. After that hour of thinking of his actions, he stood to his feet walking down the long, dark hallways to Seonghwa's room, he could hear his son's pitiful sobs from outside of the wooden door before knocking."Son.."

"Its open." Seonghwa spoke with a rasp in his voice – clearly he had been crying for a long time.

Once Seoguk stepped in he had saw what he done, his own son looking like a complete mess, dry, flaky blood imprinted on his face, eyes to match that crimson color.  
For a second, he felt sorry as he approached his son, pulling him into a loving hug, deciding maybe it was time for him to put his life back together, with or without the notorious Seoyeon.

But that feeling was temporary, his remorse all faded away when he pulled away from that "loving" hug, the moonlight of the evening night, shimmering on his son's face that made him look just like _her – his features being so distinct and abstract – just like hers._ No not just like her – it was her. It had to be. She was sitting right there infront of him. _He wished she was._

"Seoyeon.." The thickness of the air was so palpable that it made Seonghwa swallow with gritted teeth in fear. His father spoke in a low voice. 

He sounded so calm that it was scary, making Seonghwa move back a little to which his father only moved closer – and closer – and closer till he could feel his body on "Seoyeon's", Seoguk reached to his son's face while Seonghwa remained frozen in his place, holding, awaiting himself for the slap that would usually come across his face by now. He closed his eyes to yield himself, somehow, from the slap. But it never came. Instead, the elderly reached to Seonghwa's face as he stared at it like it was the only thing that mattered, as if Seonghwa was the epitome of beauty, stroking his thumb on his son's cheek before reaching his hand down, using that same hand to palm his own son through his pants, as if this was normal.

"Seoyeon I love you." His words being maniacal and absolutely insane. His mind was intoxicated on love deprivation – deprived from Soyeon made him insane, his eyes dilated.

Those words hit Seonghwa like a mac truck, hearing his mothers name. Seonghwa didn't know what to do at this point. He tried to beg his father to not touch him in those places he did, but that never worked. He tried to run, only to be slammed against the floor, airing his chest out. He tried to scream when his father ripped the fabric from his very skin, but nobody heared him, as if the whole world had gone dead, silent, all of them dead. The pain he felt was excruciating and when his father touched him in the vial areas, he felt disgusting, physically and mentally.

He was choking, he couldn't breathe, at least not in this atmosphere as he tried to fill his lungs with air was impossible, the only smell that entered him was his fathers stench of alchohol and the musk he wore to mask that scent. Why was he doing this? Has he finally gone mad? How can he do this to his own son? Those being the only thoughts that processed through Seonghwa's mind before he gave up. There was no fighting it at this point.

His father thrusted into him over, and over and over again, hitting spots that made Seonghwa want to cry, throw up and dissapear from earth all at the same time, releasing his hot, gooey semen into his son who quivered. Finally taking out his own c*ck, stroking it with force while he moaned out Seoyeon's name in escasty jerking at his overstimulation, cumming all over his son's beautiful face.

"Good girl." He spoke to his son who silently grimaced at the words before giving him a kiss on the temple standing, zipping his pants up and leaving back to his room like nothing even ever happened, like his whole objective wasn't even to apologize in the beginning.

Seonghwa remained there on the floor, semen oozing out of his hole while his tears not being able to hold themselves mixed with the semen that was splattered on his face. He couldn't move. His body was aching, covered in bruises, scars, cuts, blood and the list goes on. He couldn't look at himself the same anymore. He could take the beatings, he could take the starvation, but he felt violated this time. He felt disgusting for even letting this happen.

He hated everything.

He hated his father.

He hated everyone.

_He hated himself._

Death was on his mind every hour, every minute, every second that he remained there on the floor suffocating in his own tears, drowning in his own depression. He cried so much, his tears becoming even more and more painful to even cry and worst of all – he had to forgive his father for all of this. Because if he didn't, he would have nothing. He wouldn't have a house, he wouldn't have anything.

So he drowned in his sorrow.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My birthday is in 9 days 🥺✨

This chapter is gonna be all over the place but it's all good because the next chapters gonna be great 😃😗🤡 

.

.

.

Seonghwa didn’t remember how it started, and he didn't know why he couldn't control the tears from flowing down his eyes. Maybe it was out of impulse, or maybe his feelings were just overflowing. "Shut the hell up, I'm watching the game god dammit." His father spoke, his tone being harsh. "What are you even crying for?! You have a roof over your head, food on the table.." It was like his father was completely oblivious to anything and everything and it hurt – it hurt so much to the point Seonghwa couldn't control the anger that arised inside of him, letting all the curses and explicit phrases spill out of his mouth rapidly. 

"ARE YOU FUCKING STUPID?!" He couldn't help but scream at his father who stared at him with a dead look in his eyes, a warning that Seonghwa took, burned, and stepped on the ashes. Seonghwa felt his heart pounding against his chest – he felt like he wanted to rip his hair out of his head with his bare hands as he marched over to Seoguk – his sorry excuse for a father. 

"YOU ARE FUCKING 43 YEARS OLD! WHEN THE FUCK ARE YOU GOING TO REALIZE ALL THE MISTAKES YOU'VE MADE HUH?! YOU RAPED YOUR ONLY FUCKING SON." The words spilled out of his mouth rapidly like hellfire. , his voice cracking painfully with every word that spilled out of his mouth. Seoguk stood to his feet, taller, intimidating with a face that would scare Seonghwa, but not today, not right now and sure as hell not ever again. "WHAT? WHAT ARE YOU GONNA FUCKING DO?! HIT ME HUH?! RAPE ME AGAIN?!" 

Seoguk's face softened as he leaned into his son, chin resting against Seonghwa's shoulder. He twitched, followed by a sniffle in Seonghwa's ear. 

"I'm sorry son." He croaked out. Seonghwa's face had gone blank now, tears in his eyes as well as he wondered why those words sounded so genuine. "I really am. I know everything I did was wrong and I should probably be in jail, for everything."

Seonghwa stood frozen as his father continued to confess to him, his shirt soaking with his fathers pool of tears. "I know what I did was wrong Seonghwa. I do. And I'm sorry..I can't help it." He pulled away staring at Seonghwa with such genuine – cloudy eyes. "Please Seonghwa...forgive me. I'll be better...I promise."

Seonghwa didn't know what to say at this point. His mind was blank trying to make up something coherent but the only thing that came to his mind was nothing. Seonghwa's lips pressed into a firm line as he gave a small – slow, indecisive nod. 

His father was always so manipulative, always so good at lying. 

His father smiled at him before bringing a hand to his cheek, stroking the honey skin, his expression altering within the blink of an eye. 

He leaned in, pressing a kiss against his son's lips. 

Seonghwa was horrified – horrified all over again as he remembered the traumatic events from just a night ago. He remembered his father doing the same thing he was doing in this very moment, putting his vial lips to Seonghwa's forcefully. 

Seonghwa – he just wanted to run, he wanted to disappear, he wanted the floor to swallow and devour him whole as if it was quicksand – yet he couldn't move. He felt like gravity was holding him down, glued to his spot on the floor as if his feet were cemented to the tiles underneath of his feet. 

"Just like your mother." He leaned in again, pressing an even harder kiss to his lips, his time with tongue, forcing Seonghwa's mouth open even though Seonghwa tried so hard to keep it closed. It felt disgusting – the after taste of nicotine – weed? Mixed with some sort of underlying taste of alcohol. When Seonghwa tried to move – Seoguk snaked an arm around his waist, pulling him even closer, pressing their groins together. This was so wrong. It felt so wrong. 

"Dad please stop.." he tried to beg and plead, yet his father didn't care about anything he had to say, kissing a trail of wet open mouther kisses down his neck. In the corner of his eye, Seonghwa noticed a beer bottle sitting on the coffee table that was covered with all sorts of drugs and alcoholic drinks.

"I'm sorry dad." He whispered before grabbing the bottle quickly, smacking his fathers head with the bottle – glass and the remains of the bottle shattering all over the floor. 

"You little bitch." Seoguk lunged for him – twisting Seonghwa's black hair in his abusive hands, slapping him across the face with enough force to make his lip bleed. You couldn't just be cooperative, could you?" Slamming Seonghwa against the wall, ripping his shirt from his chest exposing his bare honey skin and all the bruises and scars that were still there. "YOU ARE MY PROPERTY YOU HEAR ME?!" 

"Fuck. You." Seonghwa didn't hesitate not one bit when he kicked his father in the groin, running to the door giving his father one last pitiful glance before he ran off, shoes clacking on the wet concrete pavement.

San sighed as he listened to his parents have another argument while he had to watch over his younger brother who looked so confused, scared and lost. He couldn't even visit his parents for one day without them getting into an argument behind closed doors – and he hated that Jongho had to be here to witness it all. 

Maybe it was his fault for not being the perfect child they've always wanted. 

He pulled his earbuds out of his leather jacket, giving them to his younger brother who silently thanked him. "I have to go now Jongho.." the older whispered before standing, giving his sibling a genuine hug.

"You better visit soon or I'll kick your ass." San chuckled at that. "You're so short the only thing you can do is bite my ankles." He said with a snort at Jongho's annoyed looking face. 

Walking out of the room, he didn't even bother to say goodbye to his parents. They didn't care about him anyways. _They never did._ They always payed no attention to San being trapped in theyre own neverending loop of arguments and cursing eachother out. San practically had to raise himself – and he could say he turned out great. 

He walked out of the house, the house he used to live in for so many years, the house that brought him hell, the house that looked so perfect on the outside – yet on the inside was a different story. Revving the engine on his motorcycle, he pulled off into the slippery streets with barely any cars on the wet road surrounding him. 

He usually loved to do this, take long rides through the night, when he was stressed. It was something about seeing a peaceful street with glowing city lights – the rush of adrenaline he felt when the wind slapped on his face...It made him feel as though everything would be alright, it made him feel free. 

Seonghwa shivered in his short sleeve shirt, freezing with the farenheit levels being what it felt like degrees below zero. With his phone already dead and nowhere to go, he felt hopeless. 

So he did what he always does when hes stressed – when he couldnt resort to drinking or sex. Seonghwa pulled out a pack of those sweet Newport cigarettes that he loved and craved on days like this, not being able to get enough of the nicotinic acids that he knew where charring his lungs but he didn't care.

Putting the stick of nicotine between his lips only to realize he didn't have a lighter. "Need a light?" Asked a voice that glided on like a sweet melodic piano playing the sweetest melody. It was a voice Seonghwa had heared before – a face Seonghwa had seen before. 

One of those faces you wouldn't forget, one of those faces with defining features, a chiseled jawline, a prominent nose, shining brown doe eyes to match with his beautifully sculpted pink lips.

Lips Seonghwa remembered. 

Lips that he could still feel the hot, stinging touches of everywhere, from his neck to his inner thighs. He remembered those lips kissing him with such intimacy that it drove him insane – wanting more and more of the youngers lips, his tongue to cover every area of his body. 

"Yea." Pulling his mind from the place he tried not to revisit as the motorcyclist got off of his bike, flicking out the lighter, the flame dancing in front of both of their faces, San holding it close to start a fire on the end of the cigarette, lighting it between Seonghwa's pretty lips that he remembered. 

Those same lips that whined in escasty. 

Those same lips that screamed out San's name. 

Those same lips that begged and pleaded to be touched more and more. 

That memory being enough to bring a grin to San's face, the grin faltering as a quiet – yet intense silence washed over the two. It was as if they couldn't take their eyes off eachother – having so much to tell eachother but not yet wanting to say the words out loud, both of them not wanting to be the first to break the silence. 

"Why are you here exactly, San?" Seonghwa asked, puffing his cigar once more lighting up the dark sky around the nub of flames and ashes. San seemed to have an indecipherable face when he spoke, something that Seonghwa couldn't solve even if he squinted and tried his hardest. "Its nothing, just going back home."

With each drift Seonghwa took of the cigarette, he felt all of his worries slipping away from him, he felt his muscles becoming less tense and more relaxed, and after a while, the cigarette had turned into nothing but ashes that Seonghwa stomped on under his feet, reconnecting eyes with San – who still stood there up against his parked motorcycle, staring deviously at Seonghwa with his honey skin exposed – collarbones dipping into his chest with his tight, distressed jeans hugging his thighs. 

"Wanna hangout?" San asked to which made Seonghwa laugh, choking on the smoke that still remained in his lungs. 

"Are you twelve?" The older asked, earning a scowl from San who sat back on his bike, revving the engine once again as the smoke polluted the air. "You coming?" 

"Depends, is hangout another word for sex?" Despite saying that, Seonghwa pursed his lips, walking over to the younger, plopping himself down on the back of the bike. "Wrap your arms," San grabbed a hold on the olders arms, wrapping them around his waist. "Here." 

Seonghwa didn't know why that sudden touch made him feel so weird. It made him feel....awkward, yet comforted, like this was something he longed for, something he knew he needed, yet didn't know how to accept. He felt his stomach flutter as he lyed his head against the youngers back, speeding through the city lights of Jinju as if they were in a movie, everything moving so fast around them it almost seemed as if the only two people in the world were those two. It was a feeling Seonghwa hadn't felt in a long – long time that he didn't want to revisit. 

"You want anything to drink?" San asked when the two entered San's apartment and wow – he was rich. Seonghwa could tell just from the dancing chandelier hanging above the living room table. "I don't want anything to drink, I just wanna fuck." Before San could even get a word out, Seonghwa's lips were on his. 

Oh how he missed his velvety, plump lips, the way they glided on to San's like honey, bolts of electricity being sent down his spine at the sudden kiss. San didn't even hesitate to kiss the older back, hands snaking around his waist. Nothing – no words were exchanged before the two were diving into eachothers bodies, Seonghwa already trying to get San's shirt off his head – craving his hot finger tips to brush against San's body. 

The kiss escalated until Seonghwa found himself draped over San's leather couch, moaning loudly at San kissed at his neck, sending the older into world of newfound pleasure. 

Everything went smoothly until San removed Seonghwa's shirt. "What the fuck." Were the only words that left his mouth staring at Seonghwa's bruised and beaten body, his bruises purple with blue hues with scars nearly all over his body. 

That's how Seonghwa spent the rest of the night, explaining everything to San while he cried his eyes out in his chest, and San didn't blame him for it nor judged him – instead, he explained his life too. Explaining all the arguments his mother and father got in, explaining all the stories where San snuck out of his window to hangout with friends. 

And then they found out they werent too different from eachother. 

내 세계에 오신 것을 환영합니다

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, yea, I know this chapter kinda sucked balls but I was so unmotivated. I'm also already working on the ending of this even tho theres so many more chapters left, but I can already see how the ending will play out. I got this whole damn book mapped out already which I'm proud of! 😸🤘 
> 
> Also if your wondering why most of the good parts are focused around either the angst or the erotic scenes, that's because the beginning/most of the book is focused on Angst and Smut, even though there will be fluff towards the very end. (Angst and smut are also my strongest genres but-) 
> 
> Sorry I took long to update. Basically what I do is update and then brainstorm for a few days, then I write the actual thing which takes like 5 hours sometimes.


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